Thursday, March 27, 2008 1:30 AM
wednesday.
i've been pretty restless this week.
and. its weds!
gosh.
and. my room light is spoilt!
so.. i'm sitting in darkness. wanted to do some reading. boo hoo.
NEXTi wonder, what do i want to do with my life?
we take it forgranted that we haf lots of time.
i dun doubt that we'll live to an old ripe age.
but honestly...
there must be more.
was talking to xiao di on sunday.
made this comment.
"when we finally say, 'God all i want is you.' the path ahead is not easy. Be ready for heartaches.
Coz when we finally realize that we want more of God. the pain and emptiness sets in. We come to a place where we understand, everything we've been relying on can nvr fill that emptiness and loneliness inside of us. And as we search for God, the emptiness only gets stronger till we find Him."
its the truth.
if like me ure saying "God! THERE MUST BE MORE!"
be prepared. coz u're gonna mt more unsatisfaction.
or mayb you already are in that place. where u feel so frustrated, many times sian, or maybe even depressed.
in the past, when i used to feel that way, i'd just push it aside and say to myself "joy, stop emo-ing"!
but in the years since then, i've begun to realize.
that when my heart aches, its coz, i've been putting my trust and faith in the wrong things.
when we start feeling this way, its like the "red light" is flashing, and God is drawing us to Him.
we feel dissatisfaction, because nothing else can satisfy except God.when we finally realize this truth, we've began that walk of drawing nearer and nearer to Him :)
NEXTI love God. Without Him, i have no life to talk about.
doesn't this sound like a foolish statement.?
and what a risky statement it is. Saying that ur whole life is based upon Him.
I'm scared when i say it, but its true.
Without God, i have nothing :)
more than that, i AM nothing."To live is Christ, and to die is to gain" (Phil 1:21)
what a powerful yet scary verse.
Monday, March 24, 2008 11:55 PM
24th march 2008
my new found love. Black forest chocolate!!
serious, i nvr bluff. its shiok .. TO THE MAX!
the choc is BEST.. and then, theres like cookie bits and jelly-like gummies. i'm drooling juz tinking about it. GO BUY ONE AND TRY FOR URSELF! :D
today, had a gd rest. slept til 12. blame the tiredness to the fun-filled activities from fri-sun! haha.. I'm uploading pictures from OFD and the sleepover at vic's hse now. prob post the links tmr. :D
NEXT
"obedience is better than sacrifice"
i remb i used to preach alot from this in 1sam 15.
but aft all that has happened. this verse just doesn't seem the same to me anymore.
the past few weeks, the word sacrifice has been used extensively. and i'm sure its a word u'd be familiar with.
i myself, learnt abt sacrifice in a whole new way.
but then.. i wonder, is there an even higher degree than sacrifice? Obedience mayb?
hmm.. i'm still asking God wad this means. as in. wad does it mean by obedience is better than sacrifice.
prob. it means. dun sacrifice for the sake of sacrificing.. some how, u can say ure sacrificing sthg, but actually, in the inner depths of ur heart, ure doing it for urself. hmm.
NEXT.
twinnie. dun tink so much k? studying is of utmost importance, but put ur eyes on God. He'll give u the strength to go through all of it :D
JP. i'm glad for u. and even tho' it may seem like its hard. dun worry! its all part and parcel of the process. most imptly, dun give up! as long as u keep gg, as long as u keep ur eyes on Jesus, u'll come out stronger :)
I need more. :) more, of you in my life. if i din haf ur love, tell me, how could i survive.
Thursday, March 20, 2008 12:04 PM
greatness. grate-ful-ness
so i'm torn between blogspot and livejournal. HAHA. but well, i guess i'll juz post at both sites?!?! :P
In all that has happened recently, God has juz wanted a simple thing from me.
For me to place my security in Him.
I guess, i nvr really did that, and so. He had to take away everything from me, so I would have nothing left, and den only would i realize, God is the only one that matters.
"Joy, Your life is for God"
--> hearing this brought about such a relief.
in knowing that all i'm going thru, its not for myself.
its for God.i'm glad, that i can finally look at life thru eyes of a higher purpose and vision.
"Blows that hurt cleanse away evil,
as do stripes the inner depths of the heart"
as painful as everything that i went thru was, God's hand is in it. I see that now.
the road ahead is rough, and gonna get worse. but, as painful as it gets, i live it, not for JOY, but, for JESUS :)
the decision i made 7 yrs ago, is a decision that i can no longer turn back from.
